Mirror

Personal Matters

It’s not very often that we get to see ourselves as others see us, but God has a way of cornering us when we least expect it. I was looking at myself in a large mirror the other day whilst I was voluntarily enduring a very distasteful procedure. I looked serious, severe, stern, and perhaps even scary. It’s quite possible the other person near the mirror thought I was angry with her. What was I doing? I was having a haircut! This matter however is far from trivial. The influential atheist philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche once said, ““They would have to sing better songs for me to learn to have faith in their Redeemer; and his disciples would have to look more redeemed!”. Alternatively, the life story of the founder of the Full Gospel Businessmen is titled The Happiest People on Earth. Whose perception is closer to the truth? What others see in us touches profoundly on our identity as creatures in the image of God.

“I Don’t Want To!”

The “I don’t want to!” attitude is not restricted to toddler tantrums; our adult lives can be just as selfish.  Paul challenged the Corinthian church over their uncontrolled speaking in tongues with a fatherly rebuke, “When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.” (1 Cor 13:11). I have been facing a major personal challenge recently that has exposed my self-centredness. Having had my ministry status with the Anglicans renewed I sensed it was time to start presiding at the communion service after a long retirement. This precipitated an emotional crisis as I knew it would mean taking up a certain “station” in the church and looking like a clergyman once again[1]. I could sense that God was calling me to do this, but the prospect of any degree of re-institutionalisation with others relating to me as “different” from them became very disturbing. I felt trapped, being called of God to assume a role which was in contradiction to deeply held feelings. I knew that if I stood behind the Lord’s Table with this inner conflict I would certainly appear serious, severe, stern, and perhaps even scary. What sort of image of God would this project to his people? This crisis began to resolve as I was directed away from my feelings to Jesus.

The Lens of the Cross

If childishness is feeling and acting on the basis of what is pleasing to ME, Jesus’ maturity is reflected in his consciousness of always satisfying the Father. ““I always do the things that are pleasing to him”” (John 8:29). Practical implications of this attitude come out in an unusual Gospel story (Matt 17:23-27). The collectors of the annual temple tax approach Peter with an inquiry as to whether Jesus pays their levy. Supernaturally aware of all this Christ poses a question to Peter, ““From whom do kings of the earth take toll or tax? From their sons or from others?””.  The obvious answer is that kings do not tax their own family. Jesus therefore declares, “Then the sons are free.””.  The children of the kingdom do not need to conform to worldly expectations. But the Lord goes on to instruct that in order “not to give offense” the tax should be paid. Jesus’ freedom as the Son of God is reflected in acting as an ordinary citizen avoiding unnecessary conflict for the sake of the reputation of the gospel. This story illustrates how we can serve God in all the ordinary circumstances of life, but the true power to transform us from emotional children to mature adults is found in the cross.

Christ himself had no personal desire for crucifixion, ““My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.”” (Luke 22:39). The cross is the place where even every possible element of self-pleasure is put to death in the experience of Jesus; ““My God…why have you forsaken me?”” (Mark 15:34). The utter selflessness of Christ’s sacrifice is the key to his ability to make mature sons like himself; “it was fitting that in bringing many sons to glory, God should make the founder of their salvation perfect through suffering.” (Heb 2:10). Over the course of our lives Jesus repeatedly confronts us with situations where we must choose between our infantile self-indulgent emotions and the possibility of bringing joy to the Father (cf. Heb 12:2). In the “happiness at all costs” atmosphere of popular culture bound Christianity this is a choice many find too difficult to make.

Consider Your Heart

Paul’s injunction “Test yourselves. Or do you not realize…that Jesus Christ is in you?” (2 Cor 13:5) is a potent reminder of the need to be constantly Christ-consciousness. My resentment about a hair cut stopped the light of the Father shining through the lens of Christ-crucified in my heart (Matt 5:16). If called to wear a strange shirt for the sake of the gospel I need the Spirit to steer me away from personal feelings about institutionalisation to the freedom of a son of the King. There is an important faith lesson in this for all of us. When we conform to our Father’s expectations he will give us Jesus. The “perfect patience” of Christ can be mine in the barber’s chair (1 Tim 1:16). Leading the people of God at the Lord’s Supper I can be in conscious union with the great High Priest above (Heb 4:14). Whatever the challenge the Lord is setting before us, when we die to our personal preferences the light of the glory of God in Christ-crucified  shines through our hearts radiating our faces so that others see the Father as he truly is (2 Cor 4:6).

Conclusion

Who is right about what can be seen through the faces of Christians today. Should they “look more redeemed” or are they manifestly “the happiest people on earth”. In Australia the jury has long ago passed its verdict. Such a judgement can however be overturned, not through some spectacular revival but by paying attention to the witness of God in the ordinary affairs of life. The simplest circumstances provide strenuous spiritual challenges to allow the drama of the crucifixion to be outworked in our lives (Gal 2:20; Eph 1:11). Through death to personal feelings and seeking what pleases God alone his light can shine through the lens of the cross in our hearts radiating the truth of who the Father truly is to those who are predisposed to see him as serious, severe, stern, and perhaps even scary.   I am being called to let go of infantile responses to things as ordinary as haircuts, as well as to turn away from self-righteous feelings with respect to a subject as important as the institutionalisation of the Church. I am sure the Lord must be speaking to you about dying to childish ways too.